[The post was created in partnership with Sunday Scaries – as always, we only write about the products that we actually like and endorse. If you like it too, you can try Big Spoon, Sunday Scaries’ newest CBD + CBN oil, for yourself with code SWEAT25 for 25% off.]
You know the feeling of stepping foot onto an airplane for the flight after a turbulent trip through the air? Just getting to your seat, you think to yourself, “I hope that doesn’t happen again.” “Will the plane fall to the earth if it happens again?” “Will I be able to keep it together if it happens again?” There becomes this sort of anxiety loop of a fear of the fear.
That’s sort of what sleeping felt like for me during the pandemic.
First I learned that sleeping wasn’t a safe space any more. The first few nights in March of 2020, I’d put my head on the pillow and pass out from the exhaustion of pivoting all fucking day with a smile on my face. And two hours later, I’d wake up spinning through thoughts that started with total and complete failure and ended with me divorced and living in my parents’ basement in Minnesota, taking care of their cats.
After a week or so of sleepless nights, I feared the act of sleeping altogether. I’d put it off as long as possible, fighting my husband to play just one more episode of The Office (seasons four through seven only, because Jim and Pam were happy and Michael was still in charge). But when I couldn’t fight lights-out anymore, anxiety would creep out of the shadows.
I’d like to say this is a specific experience to a female leader trying to weather this tempest, but I’m pretty sure if you were a human living on planet earth, you may have experienced a sleepless night or two over the past 16 months. UCDavis Health called pandemic-induced sleep disruption “a second pandemic of insomnia,” which early studies confirm on a global scale.
Sleeplessness was already on the rise before the pandemic. According to the Sleep Foundation, between 10 percent and 30 percent of adults struggle with chronic insomnia and women have a chronic insomnia risk that’s as much as 40 percent higher than men. I want to shake my fist at that second stat, but it is stressful to run the world.
(The Sleep Foundation says that stress and anxiety can lead to insomnia – and, get this, insomnia can lead to stress.)
This is the part where I tell you that I tried absolutely everything – and I did. Alcohol was a bandaid that got me to 2 am, when I’d wake up groggy, sweaty and anxious (probably the title of my memoir, if I’m being honest). Then, I created a very lengthy bedtime routine – sauna blanket, bath, a beachy-fiction book and lights out – but if the dog or the husband made a sound, I’d wake up in a frustrated sort of angry-cry fueled by an overwhelming sense of “I DID ALL OF THAT FOR NOTHING?!” Darkness, spinning, failure, divorce, Minnesota, cats.
Then, I dabbled in supplements. For a while, I was taking melatonin, which knocked me out, but the mornings were rough – akin to a three-hour hangover. Until recently, I thought that was the best I’d get. I would have to choose: accept sleep at the price of my mornings or battle for sleep all night at the price of my days. It’s like that scene in every Disney movie when the protagonist realizes the easy road is paved with consequences. I can give you legs today, but I’ll need YOUR VOICE!
So here’s the deal. I know that we’re partnered with Sunday Scaries in a formal way, but as a part of this partnership, I started taking their newest product scientifically formulated for sleep, Big Spoon which is packed with stuff meant to help you sleep including CBD and CBN. And I had a sense of, “I guess this won’t make my sleep worse” when I started taking it two weeks ago and stopped taking melatonin.
But I realized late last week that I was dreaming again – dreaming! And that might not seem like a big deal to you, but I haven’t dreamed in months. Prior to my covid-somnia, I’d found my dreams to be an incredible source of creativity and wonder. And while most nights I’m able to stay asleep through the night, the night that I did wake up (from a dream, by the way), I was able to self-soothe (aka, not put in my earbuds and watch that episode when Jim and Dwight plan Kelly’s birthday) and go back to sleep without a big hubbub. No spiraling. No failure. No divorce, Minnesota, or cats.
And I’m back to being able to get up between 6 and 7 am because I’m not fighting my way through the morning haze.
So in my experience, this stuff is effective. Early research also supports my experience – suggesting that CBD can help treat insomnia and certain sleep behavior disorders. CBN is another of the 100 or so cannabinoids found in the cannabis plant, and there are indications that CBN is a powerful sedative that can prolong sleep time.
And after more than a year of trying to knock myself out and wake myself back up, it feels a little more delightful to sleep and wake up in the morning.
Try Big Spoon, Sunday Scaries’ newest CBD + CBN oil, for yourself with code LIFE20 and get 20% off.
Oh, and by the way, this product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Results may vary. This information does not constitute medical advice and it should not be relied upon as such. Consult with your doctor before modifying your regular medical regime.